Life is 10% what happens and 90% how you react to it.

In full transparency, there is a little irony about me being a therapist. This is because I am paradoxically the client and the therapist in the same person. I have historically had lifelong battles with symptoms of depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress. I've been in and out of counseling since I was a teenager. Which resulted in some roots to my passion to be a therapist myself.

  

The fact of my life is that there has not been a shortage of different painful and wounding events. Ranging from metastatic thyroid cancer, varying abuses, and pregnancy losses. Betrayal trauma was also added to my portfolio. In a different life, I was a military spouse with an infant when it abruptly came to a crashing halt through infidelity and abandonment. Thus, I am now a single mother figuring out how to coparent.

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I am a fighter, and attest to how exhausting the fight can be. I speak with compassion and no judgment because I am keenly aware that matters of the mind are complex. If it were simple, any person would just change it. I may be able to articulate well all the things that I am educated and trained about in regards to the psyche, neuroscience, psychoanalysis etc. But that doesn’t mean that somehow I have mastered how to do it all.

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I am amidst writing a book that delves deeper into the experience of betrayal trauma and the messiness of healing. It lends into the rawness that even the strongest of us feel weak. Healers need healing and helpers need help. There is camaraderie among us to say “you’re safe to be seen, there’s no judgment here. I can relate in my own ways.” Part of being a therapist is symbolism to myself and others alike to just keep going no matter how much it doesn’t make sense. My paradoxical existence offers hope to simply be curious for the future and direct our focus to just the immediate next step, until we find ourselves somewhere else someday.